Law v. Life

The other day I asked myself, "has law school changed me?" A question to which my answer was emphatically, yes. Law school has changed me...but how?

As I began to try to answer this question my mind immediately jumped back to the first thing I was required to read for my Civil Procedure class last year. It was an article entitled, "Law v. Life: What Lawyers are Afraid to Say About the Legal Profession." The article espoused several life "lessons." I, however, failed to fully understand their significance until recently. Like many law students, I entered law school with altruistic visions of service to others. It is now, however, that I have come to realize that zealous representation of a client's cause often requires infliction of harm upon others. The disheartening point is that this harm is ethically driven. Which leads to lesson 1: "Law is the only learned profession in which one is ethically obligated to hurt people." This of course sheds new light on the idea of loving thy neighbor. I suppose my job encourages me to love my neighbor, as long as he pays me by the hour? Perhaps.

More unfortunate is lesson #2: "Law school depresses students through gloomy immersion in the risks of life, the glorification of dispute, and a process of moral neutering." To this I cannot help but agree. The study of law has transformed my mind into believing that much of life is simply an accident waiting to happen. Gone are the days of carefree activities. Now my expectation is that no matter how carefully one plans, something will malfunction and someone will be liable. This of course just means that no, I will not be accompanying you on that skydiving trip youve always wanted nor will I be renting the jet ski's at the resort in cancun from the shady umbrella with the sign that reads, "Jose's Jet ski Hacienda". No way Jose, not this girl.

Now to the moral neutering...lovely. As law students we are taught to represent clients, not causes. The result is that we are required to argue convincingly and with sincerity in support of positions in which we do not believe. There is no moral evaluation of whether your argument is right or wrong, you are judged solely on the persuasiveness and ability to remove yourself from your core values. This, for me, has been the hardest part. Dissassociating yourself from your values?! Not happening. And thus comes the struggle between being a successful law student and holding on desperately to what makes you a great person and not a great lawyer.

Maybe I have figured out the happy medium and maybe I havent. But, like any education, its a learning process and I am trying to do my best to juggle whats expected of me as a lawyer and what I should be doing as a Christian.

Ants in my Pants...Literally

I realize its been awhile since I have last blogged...but I'm gonna get back on my A game.  In any case, I was jogging a couple of weeks ago in Audobon Park near my house.  After my run, I decided to sit in the grass and stretch.  As I am stretching, I notice a tiny ant had bitten my finger.  Ouch, but no biggie, just one ant.  All of a sudden I realize that more than my finger is burning, and not in the, I'm stretching my leg too far type of way.  OH MY GOSH!  I had conveniently sat in an ant hill and those little bastards were all over me!  I immediately jump to my feet, rip off my shirt and begin beating myself with my shirt to get the ants off me.  At this point I am screaming, topless (sorry brandon), and a crowd had formed to watch what appeared to be a crazy woman beating herself with her own shirt.  Agh yes, it was a sight to behold.  Eventually, I was able to beat all the ants off of myself but not quickly enough to save myself from the scores of ant bites that were on my rear end and lower back.  

Now, I dont know if any of you have ever had an ant bite on your ass, but it aint pleasant.  I had to go straight to class from the park and I looked like one of those dogs that drags its butt across the floor because I was rubbing my butt on my chair to itch myself.  Alas, now I was the crazy lady with the ass itch.  I suppose that is better than the crazy lady who beats herself?  In any case, I have learned my lesson.  I will no longer sit and stretch in anthills because I assure you, it is no fun having ANTS IN YOUR PANTS.

Red Dress Run

Yesterday I participated in a little thing the New Orleaners like to call "Red Dress Run".  Yesterday may have been the culmination of my being.  You sign up, pay fifty dollars to charity and run in a red dress and tennis shoes through the french quarter from bar to bar drinking beer. Best part is, all the beer is free!  You go in bars...its free.  Trucks follow you as you run and throw beer at you.  From 10:00 a.m. until 8:45 last night I was a drunken red blur in a cape, a sweat band, red dress and asics.  Not gonna lie, it may have been one of the coolest things I have ever done.  So, let the countdown begin to Red Dress 2009!!  This town may be a lot of things...but boring is not one of them.  

Olympics

While watching Michael Phelps win the gold last night in the 400 IM I had an epiphany:  If beer pong were an olympic sport, I would totally win the Gold...totally.

Truck Nutz

So I am sitting at the airport waiting to fly back to Atlanta from a fabulous weekend in New Jersey with my extended family.  As the story usually goes in my family, there was a great deal of laughing, heated debate (thank you Rick) and beer drinking (thank you me?).  Among the funny conversations that occurred there was one particular stand out...the truck nutz conversation.

First, some much needed background information so as to fully understand why on earth my family was talking about truck nutz in the first place.  (I will continue to spell "nuts" with a z because my cousin Rick has informed me that the "z" makes it more bad ass....riiiight.)  In any case, my uncle used to own this monstrosity of a truck that we jokingly called an "extension of his manhood."  My boyfriend Brandon thought, obviously, that my uncle's extension of his manhood needed a big ole' pair of truck nutz to attach to the truck hitch to just dangle behind the truck like a, well, big ole' pair of nuts.  No extension of manhood is complete without a big ole pair apparently.

Unfortunately, My boyfriend was unable to make the trip up to New Jersey with me this time, but I did inform my aunt of his hope of buying my Uncle Glenn a pair.  She, rightfully so, had never heard of truck nutz.  As I am in the process of explaining the truck nutz concept my other Aunt, who is all of 5' tall and 98 lbs of librarian shouts out that she's got a pair my Uncle Glenn can borrow!  Oh good!  

I dont know what was more startling, the fact that she 1) knew what truck nutz were or 2) the fact that she did in fact have a pair.  This of course sets the room into hysterics because then the questions started to turn to, "well what color are yours?" "Do they come in sizes?"  "When did you get your nutz?" etc.  You get the point.  

Once again, my family has succeeded in taking the conversation to an innapropriate place.  The moral of the story here is, however, that its a trait that I come by honestly.  So next time I accidently say something foul, remember that I cant help it, because I am a product of environment....and awesomeness....deffinetely awesomeness.

A new addition!

My older sister just had a baby!!!  Little Rowan Elizabeth Carroll!  I'm an aunt!  No wait, I'm the #1 Aunt!  Yes, thats much better.

The addition of little Rowan to the Carroll/MacAllister families has made me realize a few things.  First, I cannot understand how there are people out there that do not believe in God.  When I saw Rowan for the first time, I looked at this most perfect and precious baby that God created and formed in my sister and it just makes me wonder how someone could think that  something so good and so wonderful could have possibly come from someone other than God.  Second, I realized that Rowan has turned me into a complete cry baby, but rightfully so, because everytime I look at her I love her more and more and realize once again that a person's capacity to love another person has no limits.

This family has been truly blessed.  

I AM FINISHED!!

This past monday, after the most dreadful four and a half hour property exam, I finished my first year of law school!  I was both physically and mentally exhausted when my exam ended at 5:45 monday evening, but I was done...and ready for jagerbombs.  Now, I realize that at 24 years old, it really is not necessary to go out and get annihilated....but, it was cinco de mayo.  Oh, and I had just finished my first year of law school.  (I plan to say that several times).  So my happy, exam worn ass, stayed out till 4 a.m. dancing....and it was fun.  Very fun.  Granted, my dance moves reached their peak at around midnight.  (I am pretty sure after that I just looked like Elaine from Seinfeld...but my friends were as incapacitated as I...so I know they dont remember.)

So here I sit, hungover, but a 2L!!  I still cant quite wrap my brain around the fact that I finished my first year.  I've always wanted to go to law school, I've always wanted to be a lawyer, and I still cant believe that I am actually  doing it.  I am actually 1/3 of the way through.  This year has brought a lot of things...stress, tears, debt to my eyeballs; but there is not a day that goes by that I dont honestly feel that it is worth every second.  I feel so so blessed that I have the opportunity to follow my dream.  I could not and would not have made it through this roller coaster ride of a first year without the love and support of my wonderful and PATIENT friends and family.  Thank ya'll and God Bless.